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  1. As of May, Florida teachers can be licensed to...

    As of May, Florida teachers can be licensed to keep a firearm in their classroom. So...In God We Trust, as long as teacher is packin' and Mom bought me a bullet-proof backpack?
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    There have been alleged rapes from DJT. That's...

    There have been alleged rapes from DJT. That's as much as can be said, right? Certain hard-righties have termed Bill Clinton a rapist because of allegations by Juanita Broaddrick; I don't want to...
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    Bus Stop Trainspotters

    Bus Stop
    Trainspotters
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    I'll bet the heirs are just as cuckoo.

    I'll bet the heirs are just as cuckoo.
  5. Trump may want to do the unthinkable (read...

    Trump may want to do the unthinkable (read something.) Sometimes being the Jewish leader is a strange gig. If he gets the Ezekiel treatment (EZ 4: 1-15), he'll have to lie on his side for 390 days,...
  6. Trump, a Mexican immigrant, and a black guy...

    Trump, a Mexican immigrant, and a black guy encounter a genie. Doesn't matter how. The genie says, "I'll grant each of you one wish." The Mexican says, "I want a safe place where my people can...
  7. Ummm...it's the new Penthouse Forum approach to...

    Ummm...it's the new Penthouse Forum approach to Freethought. My idea (shhh....) is that we let it die by neglect. Either that, or everyone changes their mental settings to 'pussy, pussy, pussy,...
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    You'll eat your kale bologna and like it.

    You'll eat your kale bologna and like it.
  9. Trump is basically a pussy. Very loud and...

    Trump is basically a pussy. Very loud and abrasive and full of swagger (about the Lakeland shooting: 'I would have tried to go in there even if I didn't have a gun', etc, etc, ad nauseam...) but...
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    Pussy Galore

    Pussy Galore
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    His drug is Trump, unless there's a drug that...

    His drug is Trump, unless there's a drug that makes you call yourself the Chosen One. (And please let there be a Trump fan who is honest enough admit how he/she, plus Franklin Graham and all of Fox...
  12. I'm pretty sure Romans 13 condemns Grover...

    I'm pretty sure Romans 13 condemns Grover Norquist to hell.
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    I've owned a lot of dachshunds and had several...

    I've owned a lot of dachshunds and had several that barked hysterically at black people -- even from the car window as we waited at a light. It's cringe-inducing (it was the subject of a brilliant...
  14. John McPhee wrote for the New Yorker in its Late...

    John McPhee wrote for the New Yorker in its Late Golden Age. He is a master stylist, and some of his essays would stretch out over two, three, or more issues. He would pick fairly obscure topics...
  15. #1 rule before the EMT squad arrives: hide the...

    #1 rule before the EMT squad arrives: hide the porn.
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    He's a teetotaler, by legend, but he's obviously...

    He's a teetotaler, by legend, but he's obviously draining a full bottle of Chateau LaDonald in front of his full-length mirror each & every night.
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    This is about nasturniums, correct? Who else...

    This is about nasturniums, correct? Who else uses store-bought plant food?
  18. Right. I'm more annoyed by the people who think...

    Right. I'm more annoyed by the people who think that polkas are music.
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    I'm sure we would fuck up G-land in a few years. ...

    I'm sure we would fuck up G-land in a few years. You don't want to see what high-capacity harpoons can do.
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    Teacher's Pet

    Teacher's Pet
  21. There are other ways to say it than 'No Fatties'....

    There are other ways to say it than 'No Fatties'. Trump turned down a would-be groupie in New Hampshire with 'That guy has a weight problem! Go home, start exercising!' He obviously could have...
  22. Anyway, Trump is 'winning'? At the start of the...

    Anyway, Trump is 'winning'? At the start of the summer, his job approval rating was up around 49%; i.e., just about as high as it's ever been. Yesterday, after a couple of months which included...
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    What is the biggest drawback to life in the...

    What is the biggest drawback to life in the jungle?
    The elephant's foreskin.
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    This Is Where I Leave You

    This Is Where I Leave You
  25. Trumptastic through the roof. DJT is the...

    Trumptastic through the roof. DJT is the clearest case of projection. Compile a list of his favorite insults and you will have a rather complete list of the qualities that he fears are...
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