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Thread: Things that make you laugh...

  1. Top | #2651
    Content Thief Elixir's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wiploc View Post
    Before anyone asks, no, we have no reason to believe that Bob has a drop ceiling.
    Well if he doesn't, then he missed an opportunity to give his kitchen a tray ceiling ...

  2. Top | #2652
    Veteran Member Wiploc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebeave View Post
    This whole cabinet story has all the signs of being an urban legend.
    Unhinged. Screwloose.

  3. Top | #2653
    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ZiprHead View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Keith&Co. View Post
    Sorry, further details would require talking to Bob. I always want to shower after talking to Bob.
    "Talking to Bob." Sounds like a metaphor for taking a crap.
    I...will have to remember that.

  4. Top | #2654
    Loony Running The Asylum ZiprHead's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Keith&Co. View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by ZiprHead View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Keith&Co. View Post
    Sorry, further details would require talking to Bob. I always want to shower after talking to Bob.
    "Talking to Bob." Sounds like a metaphor for taking a crap.
    I...will have to remember that.
    "Watch my beer. I need to go talk to Bob."

    "I'm in the bathroom talking to Bob."

    "Wow, I had a helluva talk with Bob this morning."
    When conservatives realize they cannot win democratically, they will not abandon conservatism. They will abandon democracy.

  5. Top | #2655
    Veteran Member Sarpedon's Avatar
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    Knocking off the toe kick works fine if you don't have a finished side. If you do it leaves an exposed cut.
    yeah, and so does cutting through the floor.

    If you rebuild the toe kick, you can finish it as a piece. If the toe kick doesn't quite match the rest of the cabinet, it doesn't matter as much, because they are often finished differently and installed separately. That's why they are the part you take off if you need to. Always make your cut marks at natural dividing lines, they will look natural.

  6. Top | #2656
    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebeave View Post
    This whole cabinet story has all the signs of being an urban legend. I just checked Snopes. Nothing...so far.
    So... wait. Jamie's stupid story us really bob's stupid story, which is maybe not even bob's... so both idiot's stole an idiot story to present themselves as idiots... that's some dedication to the stupid.

  7. Top | #2657
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    Wife bought this handy hand-held luggage scale so we could weigh our bags prior to going on long trip over seas (to make sure we were under the 50 lbs limit on the one large case). Prior to leaving, and after checking that our case was just within the limit, I decided that we’d be fine not taking the little scale with us (to recheck on the return).

    On the trip, the day before our return, thinking about the gifts and stuff we bought (extra weight you know), I say to wife “we should have brought the luggage scale, ‘cause it doesn’t weigh anything” ...

    … followed immediately by her saying “then why would we bring it?”

  8. Top | #2658
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    Quote Originally Posted by hyzer View Post
    Wife bought this handy hand-held luggage scale so we could weigh our bags prior to going on long trip over seas (to make sure we were under the 50 lbs limit on the one large case). Prior to leaving, and after checking that our case was just within the limit, I decided that we’d be fine not taking the little scale with us (to recheck on the return).

    On the trip, the day before our return, thinking about the gifts and stuff we bought (extra weight you know), I say to wife “we should have brought the luggage scale, ‘cause it doesn’t weigh anything” ...

    … followed immediately by her saying “then why would we bring it?”
    So she let you weigh the bags with a scale she knew didn't work?

  9. Top | #2659
    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    So, we used to prank a lot on the subs.
    Prank, initiation, felonious assault... tomato, tomahto.

    A common element in the pranking was duct tape. We taped people to chairs, to bulkheads, to overhead piping, wove duct-tape barriers to seal someone into their bunk. Five pounds of tape wrapped around someone's mug.

    Anyway, it's been 20 years since i had to worry about fellow sailors with duct tape. But i USED to worry quite a bit.

    Yesterday, i dozed at my computer desk. Youngest son called my name. I didn't wake.
    Tapped my shoe with his foot, no response.
    Went and got a roll of duct tape, pulled three inches off the roll, with that distinctive zipping sound.

    I came up outta my chair, fully cognizant of where i was, who was in the room, and who was holding that goddamned roll of tape. Son was impressed. He hadn't been sure all my sea stories were true, but this goes a long way to confirming many of them....

  10. Top | #2660
    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    "Keith, what does conjecture mean?"
    "Guess."
    "It's not like i'm asking you to help with my homework, jackass, i just don't know a fucking word!"
    “SEDAGIVE!?” - Dr. Frankenstein, not impressed with Igor and Inga’s charade guessing skills

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