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Thread: President Trump Mauled to Death By Wolves

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    Lightbulb President Trump Mauled to Death By Wolves

    WASHINGTON DC -- In tears, Vice President Mike Pence, prior to taking the oath of office, reported to the nation that the President had been killed, mauled to death by wolves.

    Early reports indicates that the President had shouted loudly for minutes in the Oval Office about wolves and how they were going to attack him, but staffing thought he was watching cable news again or Trump was just looking for attention. Busy and overworked due to another change in China Tariff policy, the staffing simply didn't take the cries for help seriously.

    Staffing immediately busted into the room after Trump was heard pleaing with god that "He'd never lie again if he'd just make the wolves go away."

    Secret Service officials had no explanation as to how the wolves managed to get into the White House in the first place, nevermind making their way to the Oval Office unseen. "Wolves are crafty creatures," noted Secret Service agent Don Michaels. "That is just their nature."

    Attempts were made to apprehend the wolves, but they managed to jimmy the windows of the Oval Office open and were last seen fleeing on the South Lawn.

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    Trump's gonna be killed by Big Macs, onion rings, and chocolate cake.

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    It's hard to express the manner in which I personally would like to see him go, without violating rules or even laws.
    Let me try to phrase this as carefully as I can.
    IF the president HAPPENS to be assassinated by some misguided crazy person that should not be seeking violent means to free the country from his grip, then I would be the least unhappy about that if it went down like this...
    He's up on a podium, spouting nonsense and crap that one has to put on their "dumbass voice" to be able to repeat out loud, and the assassin's bullet strikes him in the throat.
    Blood and gore spouting out of his face on live Television, accompanied by inhuman, grotesque sounds of choking on blood and spitting bone...
    That being the last impression everyone has of him.. so that forever, anytime anyone even mentions the name Trump, an instinctual recoil and disgust is felt at the memory of the sight and sounds of his gory, painful, grotesque death on live TV.

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    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    " Secret Service officials had no explanation as to how the wolves managed to get into the White House in the first place,"

    Did anyone ever show Scaramucci or Bolton where Kennedy's sex tunnel is in the basement? Especially where it comes out at?

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    Those wolves snuck into your country across the Canadian border. We told you people to give us the money to build a wall but you said no. That makes this your fault.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Sawyer View Post
    Those wolves snuck into your country across the Canadian border. We told you people to give us the money to build a wall but you said no. That makes this your fault.
    I can live with that.

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    Elder Contributor Keith&Co.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hurtinbuckaroo View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Sawyer View Post
    Those wolves snuck into your country across the Canadian border. We told you people to give us the money to build a wall but you said no. That makes this your fault.
    I can live with that.
    Live with it? I'd get a patch made. "Built no wall, wolves ate, LOL!"

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    Intergalactic Villainess Angry Floof's Avatar
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    So sad. We're a nation in mourning.

    OK, now that the mourning period is over, let's get Pence a new swearing in gown! I think pearls will best highlight his grey skin and hair.
    The Authoritarians

    GOP and Trump supporters will not be able to say they didn't know. Vote in numbers too big to manipulate.

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    Veteran Member TV and credit cards's Avatar
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    I should really have that last bit of salmon for supper but I’ll probably make a pizza instead.

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    I keep clicking on this thread, hoping that one of these times it's going to turn out to be true.
    Damn you Higgins!

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