Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: "The Juice"

  1. Top | #1
    Elder Contributor
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    Located 100 miles east of A in America
    Posts
    24,100
    Archived
    42,473
    Total Posts
    66,573
    Rep Power
    100

    Lightbulb "The Juice"

    So anyway, I'm probably a couple years away from colonoscopies and the like, but I have someone in my family that needs a scan and was making with the drinking. And that got me, unfortunately, thinking about what is important in life. Like an SNL sketch with Melissa McCarthy's first day at a hospital on a floor with nothing but people drinking "The Juice". I also came up with an idea of carbonating it.

    Regardless, I also was thinking of rebranding the product so it'd sound more exciting and get people into drinking it before their colonoscopies. These are the names I've arrived at so far:

    • Blowhole
    • Rectum Ravenger
    • Jetstream
    • Toilet Tantrum
    • Bathroom Beast
    • The Bum's Rush
    • Porcelain Powerwash
    • Backfire!


    Any ideas for the peanut gallery?

  2. Top | #2
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    24,752
    Archived
    96,752
    Total Posts
    121,504
    Rep Power
    95
    It's a shitty product.

  3. Top | #3
    Formerly Joedad
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Location
    PA USA
    Posts
    5,223
    Archived
    5,039
    Total Posts
    10,262
    Rep Power
    75
    Shitter Gitter.

  4. Top | #4
    Veteran Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    Location
    seattle
    Posts
    4,924
    Rep Power
    12
    If you haven't had one before you are in for a really unique experience. I'd call the laxative purge a 'brown shower'.

    Having something shoved up your butt for 20 minutes is undignified to say the least.

    The good thing is if you get a clean bill of health you can relax a lot. If something is found early it is all treatable.

  5. Top | #5
    My Brane Hertz spikepipsqueak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Victoria
    Posts
    3,028
    Archived
    8,811
    Total Posts
    11,839
    Rep Power
    49
    Pre-anal bleaching.

    Liquid Roto Rooter.

    Power Poo Shifter


    Your list reminded me of an image from the birth of the internet, that I haven't been able to find for years. Picture the arms and legs of a skeleton draping out of a toilet bowl. The caption is ''Agarol, the gentle laxative.''
    My Brane Hertz

  6. Top | #6
    Contributor DBT's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    ɹǝpunuʍop puɐן
    Posts
    8,908
    Archived
    17,906
    Total Posts
    26,814
    Rep Power
    70
    Let Fly: Bio Cleanser with Taste.

  7. Top | #7
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    24,752
    Archived
    96,752
    Total Posts
    121,504
    Rep Power
    95
    Quote Originally Posted by steve_bank View Post
    If you haven't had one before you are in for a really unique experience. I'd call the laxative purge a 'brown shower'.

    Having something shoved up your butt for 20 minutes is undignified to say the least.

    The good thing is if you get a clean bill of health you can relax a lot. If something is found early it is all treatable.
    A colonoscopy is generally done under anesthesia.

    Are you perhaps thinking of a flexible sigmoidoscopy? Same idea but it only goes in as far as the first corner, no anesthesia.

  8. Top | #8
    Veteran Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    Location
    seattle
    Posts
    4,924
    Rep Power
    12
    Quote Originally Posted by Loren Pechtel View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by steve_bank View Post
    If you haven't had one before you are in for a really unique experience. I'd call the laxative purge a 'brown shower'.

    Having something shoved up your butt for 20 minutes is undignified to say the least.

    The good thing is if you get a clean bill of health you can relax a lot. If something is found early it is all treatable.
    A colonoscopy is generally done under anesthesia.

    Are you perhaps thinking of a flexible sigmoidoscopy? Same idea but it only goes in as far as the first corner, no anesthesia.
    All the way through. I had one last year. I did not use any drugs. There is little pain. They administer meds to keep you relaxed so you do not panic with a TV camera up your ass.

    The drug they wanted to use was phenomenal and I questioned the application of such a strong drug, and said no drugs. I grinned and bared it like a real man should.

  9. Top | #9
    My Brane Hertz spikepipsqueak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Victoria
    Posts
    3,028
    Archived
    8,811
    Total Posts
    11,839
    Rep Power
    49
    I've had a bunch of them. Colonoscopy and the stomach end.

    My understanding is that you are conscious throughout but they give you a drug that stops you laying down memories, so that nothing of the procedure stays with you.

    I was fine with that until the next but last one. They seemed to be treating me differently. I fear I may have said/done something.
    My Brane Hertz

  10. Top | #10
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    24,752
    Archived
    96,752
    Total Posts
    121,504
    Rep Power
    95
    Quote Originally Posted by spikepipsqueak View Post
    I've had a bunch of them. Colonoscopy and the stomach end.

    My understanding is that you are conscious throughout but they give you a drug that stops you laying down memories, so that nothing of the procedure stays with you.

    I was fine with that until the next but last one. They seemed to be treating me differently. I fear I may have said/done something.
    Propofol puts you out, it doesn't just mess with your memories. Some people are scared of it because it's what killed Michael Jackson but that's because it was misused. It has the known side effect of occasionally stopping your breathing--but that's why an anesthesiologist is mandatory when using it. They're prepared to use a ventilator if need be, it's no big deal. Without that constant monitoring it's a very big deal.

    Likewise, the big judgment against the company from the mess in Las Vegas wasn't due to any danger of the drug. They lost that case because they weren't allowed to present a defense. They provided it in vials a doctor could misuse, nothing more.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •